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I need to stop looking at my old journal entry, and since I have facebook currently deactivated I needed to vent somewhere, so...

My very best wishes that Rise of Tomb Raider fails for screwing over its playstation fan base.  What kind of money did Microsoft have to give you to screw over the the majority of your fans who loved the 2013 game?  (yes, it sold better on PS3 and PS4.)

Always more games to play then I have time, but I was set to buy this, now I probably never will.
  • Drinking: Solar Flare
If you read the book it seems like you will like it decently.  If you did not read the book like me then you will clearly see that the movie fails to properly explain itself.  The characters are fairly boring and their interactions barely become interesting.

While watching 'The Hunger Games' I couldn't help but think I could have been watching Gladiator again, and actually enjoying myself.  

They have such similar ideas.  Slaves forced into killing games, audiences that find it entertaining and government heads that struggle to keep the popularity of the people due to the noble exploits of the main character.  The difference is Maximus is a much more compelling character with a more complex goal.  Gladiator is essentially a revenge film.  We want the main character to venge Commodus because he is an extremely wicked man who has deceitfully taken the emperor's crown and affectively destroyed Maximus's entire life.  The antagonist is a real challenge to the protagonist.  We are not sure if Maximus's lawful nobility and brawn will be able to overcome the villain's unruled evil and wit.  Maximus must learn to patiently outwit the villain in a game without rules as his physical strengths are literally drained from him.  That's dynamic and interesting.  The true power of Gladiator though is that it elevates itself beyond a mere revenge film.  The theme is not about justice, but about inner peace.  While the main character loses his physical battle he wins in his spiritual battle.

So is Hunger Games a revenge film?  No.  Alright so what is its motivation?  Survival?  Alright, so the goal is to not die, or in reality show terms, not get voted off.  Okay, I guess that is...maybe interesting.  

Also where are the character dynamics being challenged in the Hunger Games?  Seneca Crane (guy with the crazy beard) is much like Commodus in that he is a sniffling young jerk who is trying to please the greater body of people, but why?  He doesn't even seem to be the real ruler.  President Snow is the real ruler, Crane seems to be a mere jester.  In Gladiator Commodus's character is established by him killing the Emperor, his own father, so that he can keep the kingdom out of Maximus's hands.  Crane meanwhile does absolutely nothing.  He's some rich brat just like Commodus, but as far as we know he hasn't done anything evil, he is simply allowing these killing games proceed, just like everyone else watching.  He hasn't personally killed anyone, and he never personally sought out to ruin the main character's life, this futuristic society in general did that.  So is society the real villains here?  So what does that make the people actually gleefully watching this film?  Do they not perpetuate this sense of thrill in seeing children kill each other?  Even if this is accurate the sense of a real antagonist is never present and is fairly obtuse and intangible.

Oh right, there are those blood thirsty children from district one and two right?  So what is so compelling about them?  They are trained killers that we assume are better off, at least they act like rich bratty equivalents of high school jocks and cheerleaders.  So I guess that would make bookworms naturally hate them.  Where as Katniss is a poor, personally trained killer from West Virgina, uh I mean District 12, who doesn't...like killing other children.  So how exactly is this compelling?

At least with Commodus we get the feeling that he has deeper goals.  He wants power, but he also wants to be well liked by the people of Rome just as his father was.  How does he try to achieve this?  He brings Gladiators back into the Colosseum because the citizens enjoy the blood sports.  This backfires because it brings Maximus back into his life because he has become a slaved fighter.

The main evil kid from District 1 is tall, mean and slaughters a bunch of kids.  Obviously he wants to win, but why?  It isn't because he is afraid of losing, he volunteered for this blood fest after all.  If he wins will District 1 give him 40 young virgins?  Will he get a treasure?  Will his father finally love him?  Why would other people team up with him?  He is obviously going to kill you, the rules say there can only be one winner after all.  Things aren't adding up.

I feel like what should have happened is that because Katniss is such an awesome hunter the capital city requests that she 'volunteer' for the Yum-yum Games because the previous season they had fairly poor viewer ratings and they need to make sure they have a much more dynamic game of challengers in the next season.  She obviously refuses.  So weird beard secretly sends in District 1 killer kids to slay Katniss's younger sister and prozac popping mother.  They accuse her of murder and the punishment for murder is automatic qualification for the din-din games.  Gale (Katniss's true love, but you wouldn't really know it in the movie) does everything in his power to get his name in the raffle as many times as he can so he can get selected and help save Katniss.  (Which is way more interesting then giving her a piece of starchy bread.)  But Peta, savior to animals, gets picked instead.  Katniss's opposite in every way possible.  Oh how he hates that Peta...but he's so freakin hot!  Isn't that a more compelling plot?  Of course it is my silly book reading, uncultured cinematic children!

Oh, and one more thing.  Why should I care so much about the cute little african american girl being killed?  I know, she was a doll, but that's it.  The main character bonds with her for about three minutes of screen time.  So I don't believe their shallow relationship whatsoever.  In Gladiator when one of Maximus's friends die we have spent much more time with them, time in which a bond beyond whistling has been established.

Educate yourselves please.
  • Listening to: DCK2 Soundtrack
  • Watching: The Hunger Games
  • Playing: Sly
  • Eating: Soup
  • Drinking: Pepsi Next
I was randomly searching dA earlier today.  I stumbled upon an art submission that others used as a platform to demean religion.  Later on I decided to watch 'The Green Mile' for the first time in about five years.  Being a movie that centers on spiritual mystics I began to ponder the reality of what a soul is, and how it is declared in a piece of art.

I felt like typing these thoughts down and sharing them with you.

I respect anyone's personal beliefs.  If someone doesn't believe in religion, or God I can respect that.  There are infinite ways to be a good, productive person in our mortal society.  However, I wonder, is it possible to deny a spiritual sense of life?  I find drive in life by knowing that there is a greater spiritual body we cannot see.  Individual souls that reside in all walks of life.

I express this because it is necessary for my next set of thoughts.

Art that really connects with an individual in a deeper manner connects with the soul.  Without believing in a greater being, or purpose, still most individuals feel 'something' formed between them and a complete stranger (the artist).  The catalyst to this feeling is the art.  How is this achieved?

This inner connection cannot be seen nor scientifically proved.  And yet, an artist must use tangible material, and scientific rules to form this art.  Souls cannot simply communicate freely, they are completely dependent on our mortal rules.  We must use lines, colors, pigments, computers, and time to somehow form what is otherwise a concealed dimension.  

This does not mean that all art must be serious, or 'soul searching', but reflecting on it makes me want to be more faithful to my characters.  How do I better represent their reality so that a inner conflict is established?  

Reality.  Do you draw it the way it really is, or the way it feels?  What is more true to life?  In Reality.

I say these things knowing there isn't an exact answer and I am glad.  If there was an absolute answer there wouldn't be anything left to artistically express.  I am grateful for the time I have to reach into myself and try my best to pour that unfiltered, into flawed forms.  Thank goodness it's a fight.
  • Listening to: Camera Obscura-James
  • Watching: The Green Mile
  • Playing: Band Hero
  • Eating: Chic-Fil-A
  • Drinking: 2% Milk
I got a PS3 a couple months back.  I love it, and while I'm taking a break to finish the school semester strong I still wanted to see if anyone else has a PSN username.

I am a trophy whore...even though I'm pretty lame at video games.  So yeah, if anyone would like to add me as a friend that would be cool.

I need more people to compete with for trophies. @_@
  • Listening to: Gorillaz-Plastic Beach
  • Reading: Intro to Film
  • Watching: Remember Me
  • Playing: Warhawk
  • Eating: Carls Jr.
  • Drinking: Wat-of the-er
So I bought several packs of splendid blue and red col-erase pencils back in 2003.  Well I finally ran out this year.  I spend 30 dollars buying more packs a few days ago.  Sure, the brand name switched from stanford to prismacolor...but it should be the same beautiful pencil right?

WRONG!

This is the pointy object satan now uses to penetrate happy whores hopeless eye sockets.  I mean come on!  What kind of idiot sleeps around with such a beautiful thing to make these sub par, waxy pencil babies.  It's sick!  The color is way off, the quality is way more grainy and it doesn't erase nearly as good.  They are now glorified scripture markers I can buy for 30 cents at christian store.  DA!

What do you people use?  Do you have a different pencil you use for sketching/construction lines?  I use to.

Hopefully someone out there has good advice.  For now, I'll suffer.
  • Listening to: Whatcha Say -Jason Derulo
  • Reading: World War Z/Screenwriter's Bible
  • Watching: Ponyo/Arrested Development S.2
  • Drinking: MD:Code Red
So a possibly horrible thing became a very, very awesome thing.  As some of you know I recently bought a refurbished 20 inch imac.  Well just this past week apple released...THE NEW IMACS!  DAAAA!  My version NEW was suddenly 200 dollars cheaper, and it had a nicer graphics chip!  

This made me pretty bummed.  I knew a new one was coming sometime soon, but I had no idea they would DROP the price.  Well I looked up the price warranty and if the update was within 14 calendar days of your purchase AND you call apple within 14 days after the price change you will get a credit/refund of the difference.  Well I just got 322 dollars back!

So I got my nice new computer which more than meets my needs for 999 dollars.  Kinda expensive for a PC, way cheap for an apple.  So yeah, I'm really happy!  YAY!
It was far past time.  I like it when people have random images on their ID, so I made this one.  If you ever watch Food Network you know who she is.  Yeah...I watch Food Network, you got me.  Mainly just HGTV though.  Severing a man's head, it starts a home! ^_^  YAY!

Anyways, art wise I've been doing pretty well filling up my sketchbook.  I hope to post something on my gallery soon, but my sketchbook stuff doesn't really scan so we'll see when I get to something.  Perhaps something pokemon will grace my gallery soon.

Have a good one guys!
  • Listening to: Pat Matheny-Secret Story
  • Watching: Rachel Getting Married
  • Drinking: White Grape Juice
The day finally came.  I now have a new computer, wohoo!  Just messing with it and transferring files.  Hopefully I can figure this thing out, and be all good and dandy within the next few days.
  • Listening to: The Killers (new CD)
  • Playing: Monopoly (Wii)
Today I have been on dA for two years.  I feel like I haven't taken advantage of my profile, nor the community.  I need to talk more, I need to DRAW more.  I'm thinking this is going to be my breakout year.  I'm going to stop wasting time helping handicap kids and draw.  Yeah, that would be a joke, but I'm serious, I need to buck up.  I've been doing too much of the f...variety.

I really like checking out peoples work and journals, but I need to comment more.  So I may very well fail at all this but I will make an effort.

Have a great day guys!
  • Listening to: Mika
  • Watching: Spaced
  • Playing: Final Fantasy 12
  • Drinking: Water
I have spent hours upon hours trying to find GOOD figure drawing models.  I don't want porn, I don't even want bikini or speedo reference because too often the pose is lame or the file is too small.  I even tried to find some books to download and there was nothing, just how to draw stuff.

I just had to say that because I'm really tired of wasting my time when I just want to draw, or do SOMETHING more productive than go to hundreds of dead ends on the internet.

Tomorrow I think I'll just model for myself.  Probably end up being more useful than anything else.  Thank the silly monkeys of donutland for digital cameras.
  • Listening to: The Warlocks-Moving Mountains
  • Watching: Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist
  • Drinking: Aquafina
Just came back from the theaters, watched Taken and it was all the fun I wanted it to be.  Not amazing, but not bad.  A 7 out of 10.  I really enjoyed it.
  • Watching: Taken
  • Drinking: Coke
So if you were to buy a imac would you wait for a refresh with a better chip, or buy now?

If you were going to buy now which of these two options would you do?

Refurbished iMac 24-inch 2.8GHz Intel Core 2 Duo

24-inch glossy widescreen display
2GB memory
320GB hard drive
8x SuperDrive (DVD±R DL/DVD±RW/CD-RW)
ATI Radeon HD 2600 PRO with 256MB memory
Built-in iSight Camera

1,550 dollars

or

Refurbished iMac 20-inch 2.66GHz Intel Core 2 Duo

20-inch glossy widescreen display
2GB memory
320GB hard drive
8x SuperDrive (DVD±R DL/DVD±RW/CD-RW)
ATI Radeon HD 2600 PRO with 256MB memory
Built-in iSight Camera

1,300 dollars

I'm sure a bigger screen is nicer...and I want one.  But if I get the smaller screen I could possibly afford getting a cintiq 12WX.

So which would you get?
  • Listening to: Elbow- Grounds for Divorce
  • Watching: Dexter S1&2
  • Drinking: Water
Okay, this is nothing really but I haven't been updating at all because I'm taking 19 credits in school this semester.  So I have art, lots of art actually, but no real time to scan it in till December.  That is all.
  • Listening to: The Black Angels
  • Watching: Christine
  • Drinking: Limeaid
Will The Dark Knight make over 450 million in domestic box-office?

The Dark Knight is the fastest film to reach 200 million. It took only five days, and while films these days tend to burn out fast one must wonder if this film has the legs to surpass most records.

The Dark Knight made 24 million on Monday, and 20 million on Tuesday. There is only one other film to make more on a Tuesday and that was Transformers of last year. The difference to this number is it was Transformers first day, and it was the day before July 4th. (A huge American holiday.)

In further comparison, films like Spider-Man 3 (previous holder before Batman for fastest to 150 million), Pirates 2 (last film to make over 400 million), and Shrek 2 (made over 400 million, and is the third largest domestic gross of all time) all made around 10 million a day on the week days proceeding its first weekend. The Dark Knight is literally making double the amount of these other films!

Almost always, films in their second weekend make half of what they made in the first weekend.

The Dark Knight made 158 million its first weekend. That means this next weekend it should make around 80 million.

On Wednesday lets say it only makes 15 million, as well as on Thursday. By the end of next weekend The Dark Knight will have made around 313 million in 10 days!

Other films on the horizon, X-Files 2 and Mummy 3 in my opinion will have a hard time. X-Files 2 is not well advertised, and much like Mission: Impossible:3 must fight an uphill battle and it will be lucky to make over 100 million. Mummy 3 will probably do fairly well in its first weekend, but I personally have a hard time seeing it making more than Hancock (roughly 200 million at most). Then we have three rated R comedies, Step Brothers, Pineapple Express, and Tropic Thunder which shouldn't really touch Dark Knight at all.

The Dark Knight will easily make over 400 million, the real question is will it beat Pirates 2, Phantom Menace, E.T, Shrek 2...or even Star Wars?

Pretty exciting stuff I must say.
  • Listening to: Dark Knight Soundtrack
  • Watching: The Dark Knight
  • Eating: Tootsie Fruit Rolls
  • Drinking: Dasani
I really only have one collecting hobby, and that would be DVDs.  Sometimes I'll sit and stare at my collection rather than actually watch a movie and it still brings me satisfaction.  Yeah, that is kind of gross.

Anyways, I thought maybe some of you would like to see.  Amazed, or do you have more than I do?  Please comment! ^_^

holly-jolly.dvdaf.com/owned
  • Listening to: No Handlebars
  • Watching: Wall-E
  • Drinking: Apple-Strawberry-Kiwi Juice
I really am enjoying this game so far.  I picked it up at midnight and instantly started playing online mode.  I am hooked.  I am usually not the greatest but I typically win in the online set up, especially in battle mode.  I really love it and the SNES courses they have.  So great.

Anyone else have it yet?
  • Listening to: Mogwai (Happy Songs for Happy People)
  • Watching: Cloverfield
  • Playing: Mario Kart Wii
  • Eating: Mimi's Cafe
  • Drinking: Water
I'm going through something I invented, however I will remove the patten so you can enjoy it in your own bliss if you feel so impressed.

I call it...early life crisis.

I think college is stupid in principle and in paper.  I think it is brilliant for what it creates, organized networking and forced submission to a greater good.  I mean you get to meet people who share interest and you do the art you may have not otherwise try.

It's stupid because really college by paper is just a way of the government and business weeding people out by making them do things they hate.  "Most people can run five miles if they must, but how many can run it...on a track full of marbles."  That is the evil side of college.

I also do not enjoy the sinkhole it is for anti-religious prophets.  It amuses me how many young people will cry against organized religion...yet they learned this mainly through organized education.

So what am I getting at?

I'm going to college, I'm finally giving in.  I'm failing on my own, I don't draw enough since I've been out of high school and I really don't want to lose it.  I also would like to have an art JOB while I work on my comic in my free time.

Most art jobs don't sound appealing to me though.  Animator, graphic designer, inker...yeah it just sounds lame.  I only want concept design, writing or a directing job.  All of which are low on the possible side.

So I'm thinking art teacher.  At least for now, tomorrow maybe murderer again but really I have a passion for it today.

I like the idea of being an art teacher a lot.  I enjoyed my art classes and my art teachers.  I had friends in those classes.  I like helping people learn to draw, but it is very hard through the internet.  I want to be an art teacher who shapes lives and changes the system.

Why is it that we start kids out with music at such a early age?  Fourth or fifth grade it's the recorder, sixth you pick a instrument and get to play it in class twice a week.  Seven and Eighth it is an elective and then in High School it is your life.  At least that is the way it worked in my school system.  Do they do that for art?  Nope.

Art is a fun play thing the crazy loner kids do when they aren't sucking glue or killing people.  Music teachers HAVE to know music, art teachers...well they, uh must know how to pass out brushes and write As on report cards.

I want to teacher high school art, but I want to go to the middle schools that cycle into my high school.  I want all the kids interested in art to come to my class and get started on the basics while they're basically infants.  That way in high school they are doing what people do in college.

I want to give people Fs, lots and lots of FAILING grades!  Why is it that a math geek can take art thinking it is an easy class and be right...as always!?  Yet they can't draw a stick man without its spinal cord extending past its non existing nose?  It is stupid.  In my class you will be graded on effort.  When I had to take gym class I was expected to lift 25 pounds more on the last day than I could in the first.  The same principle will apply.

If a kid wants to do abstract that is fine by me but they will have to think.  What is abstract art?  Is it art art, or is it art design?  Does it really work on its own, or should it simply highlight a living space?

That would bring me a good amount of joy.  I know people say teachers don't get paid very well but then again they get paid twice to three times what I make and I work way more hours.  They get four months out of the year off I currently get two days a week off, usually a lame day and I get to often work till 1 in the morning.  No paid vacation.  (Waves a yi-pee flag between two fingers)

Sure, maybe art teachers have to pay for their class supplies a bit, but if I CAN get into the job really it is the easiest of teachers.  No papers to read, no tests and homework to grade.  Just a couple of pictures to look at and say yea or nay to.  That is it, or is it?  I don't want to grade papers, but I want to use that extra time to go that extra mile currently failing in the art programs of this country.  I think it can easily be done.

And you know, with those extra months in the summer I may just very well get some comics and stories done.

I could have an okay life career wise, and that possibility is something I think I'm ready to at least run over marbles for.

Who knows, maybe five years down the line when I'm nearly thirty I'll have just broken my neck twice for nothing but I'm hoping for the best.
  • Listening to: Finding Neverland soundtrack
  • Watching: Charlie Wilson's War
  • Playing: Bomberman Land
  • Eating: Chili's
  • Drinking: Waddher!
I'm being torn right now.  I want to mess more with animation and ditch my dull comic.  More and more I'm learning I don't like the comic format.

Too many comics BORE me.  I try to sit down and read other webcomics and about 96% are far too boring because the characters talk in paragraphs.  WRITE a novel if you are going to be so blunt!  (Or a video game walkthrough.) Could you imagine if in a movie everyone went on in long winded explanations and random banter with next to no added expression?  It would be horrible.

I'm not saying I need 100% action, I just feel like too many comic artists don't know how to communicate and/or are lazy.  The worst part is I don't know if I can escape it.

The more I think about where I'm going to take these characters...it really frightens me.  Five days ago I was listening to music and thinking about one of the characters deaths I have planned and I couldn't stop crying.  I became that character, felt their vivid pain and couldn't stop the emotions from taking over.  I hadn't cried in quiet a while and I guess it really disturbed me.  

I was like "Oh my gosh, I can't do this.  If people read my comic I'd be a murderer, but since no one does if I do this...it will be blunt suicide."

So I stopped, I shut down Photoshop and didn't look at it again.  The themes are so personal and real for me.  Santa Sucks Blood is literally Schindler's List meets Candyland.  It won't be easy writing super sweet stuff and the depths of darkness in one story.

It may tear me apart but I probably have to finish it now.  I'm far more sick of starting my projects and ditching them.  I'm going to do this.  If it catches on in four months cool, if it doesn't then by Christmas of 2008 I think I'll just skip a bunch of sub stories and kill all the characters.

Yay!
  • Listening to: John Williams (E.T. Soundtrack)
  • Watching: There Will Be Blood
  • Playing: Geometry Wars (Wii)
  • Eating: Chipotle & Nerds & Mike and Ike
  • Drinking: Juice
Crazy I've been on deviantart for exactly a year now.  I was hoping somehow I would reach the 1000 pageview mark by this time but that doesn't just happen on its own.  I've met a couple new people through this place which I always enjoy and I'm very glad I am able to keep in touch with some old art friends...or at the very least just seeing your new art work is very warming and encouraging to myself.

I'm really hoping art wise I'm less lazy this coming year.  The last few years have mainly been a lot of writing so bla-bla-bla, I just need to switch back and keep going.

Since I really enjoy movies I'm going to quickly post the top ten films of 2007.  Of course this is a list made without me having the chance to see No Country for Old Men or There Will Be Blood.

1.) American Gangster

2.) Hot Fuzz

3.) 300

4.) Micheal Clayton

5.) Planet Terror

6.) Zodiac

7.) Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

8.) Sweeney Todd: Demon Barber of Fleet Street

9.) The Bourne Ultimatum

10.) Disturbia

Other than that if you are reading this but not my new webcomic SANTA SUCKS BLOOD, please check out my gallery and read it from the beginning.  It will probably take less than ten minutes.  Thanks guys!
  • Listening to: Blonde Redhead (23)
  • Watching: The Darjeeling Limited
  • Eating: Chipotle
  • Drinking: Canada Dry
Anyone know about a coloring tutorial for photoshop were the reference is an anime snake lady?  I found it, and then lost it and got an error when trying to fav it.  It was awesome...now it is gone.  I'm trying really hard to cry but instead my face just looks dry and fussy.

I'm super annoyed, it's like losing a wedding ring in the pacific ocean.  I'm not finding it, but you guys are lifeguards right?  You could help...maybe.  No the tutorial, not a ring.  Yeah, thanks.

Other then that children scream when you eat them alive, but they scream when they don't get candy or when told to take naps so it doesn't really feel out of the ordinary.  They taste better too, compared to cows and stuff, just wear ear muffs, they are only 5 dollars at most mart places.  The screams will be muffled into soft good-byes with pastel colors.  For the child, just steal one from a daycare, they won't notice.  Just get the thing tested, don't want to be eating a aids baby you know.  That's all.

Oh, for the record I've eaten a white kid, a black kid, but never ever a blue kid, M&Ms got me there.
  • Listening to: The Flaming Lips (It Overtakes Me)
  • Watching: The Brave One
  • Playing: Smarty Pants
  • Eating: Mexican Eggs
  • Drinking: Ocean Spray Cran-Ras No Suga Added!